Well yesterday was a day that I needed. After a boring day at work, I ended up meeting with the guy I really like for coffee.
It was a much needed trip. I was all nerves because I have a huge crush on him. After an amazing 2 hour conversation about our lives, music, movies, love, etc, I realized that he is not the guy for me. However, I feel that he has been put into my life for a reason. Not sure what that is yet, but I'm sure it will be revealed to me eventually. I am excited to find out though.
I always try to be the kind of person that brings a positive light into other people's lives. I have had a lot of experiences in life that weren't the best, done some things that are horrible, and have hurt and lost people that I have cared about. But I am trying to be a person that will go out of their way for others and help out as much as I can without it tearing me to pieces. Does that make sense? I always give positive advice and do nothing but edify people and not tear them down, even if they do things that upset or hurt me.
So with the situation with this guy, I feel like I am that person in his life. Like he wants me to be in his life to help lift up his spirits and provide encouragement. I may be reading into this completely wrong, but that is what I want to believe, and that's what I will live by for now. He once told me "you're like an extra long fortune cookie". One of my favorite compliments ever.
As far as this situation goes, I will leave it as is. He will be my friend. I will be there for him, but I will no longer help him out financially (I lent him $40 once for gas) and I will no longer go out of my way to see him. I will, however, support his music career, and be a positive friend and person in his life.
I posted this Bible verse on my facebook page, and I think it not only speaks truth but it applies to my life right now and the current struggles I am facing.
1 Peter 5:10 "And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace,
who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ,... will himself restore,
confirm, strengthen, and establish you"
I cant wait for the day when I will truely be blessed and be shown what God has in store for my life. Until then, I am going to live my life :)